
Relatively Random Musings #9
Is the muse no longer amused? Is she sick of me? Is she coming back? These pathetic questions are all part of the ebb and flow. No one wants the ebb. This is sadly my creative process. The blank canvas that sits in the corner until the moment of inspiration. And then the flow that blows me away. How was I able to create this work of art? Why do I doubt the creative force that runs through the universe? When the energy shifts, I always think it’s over but it was just evolving

Relatively Random Musings #9
Is the muse no longer amused? Is she sick of me? Is she coming back? These pathetic questions are all part of the ebb and flow. No one wants the ebb. This is sadly my creative process. The blank canvas that sits in the corner until the moment of inspiration. And then the flow that blows me away. How was I able to create this work of art? Why do I doubt the creative force that runs through the universe? When the energy shifts, I always think it’s over but it was just evolving

Relatively Random Musings #8
How hard is it to be brave? Is it as hard as feeling like a coward? In the past I know I was brave when a few intense life events descended upon me. But was I only brave in a dramatic scenario? Aren’t there a million every day opportunities to be brave? I think those are harder to do. In an extreme crisis, all eyes are upon you, so of course you try to have a big spirit and rise to the occasion. But when it’s just me without an audience I’m tempted to wear the yellow stripe o

Relatively Random Musings #8
How hard is it to be brave? Is it as hard as feeling like a coward? In the past I know I was brave when a few intense life events descended upon me. But was I only brave in a dramatic scenario? Aren’t there a million every day opportunities to be brave? I think those are harder to do. In an extreme crisis, all eyes are upon you, so of course you try to have a big spirit and rise to the occasion. But when it’s just me without an audience I’m tempted to wear the yellow stripe o

Relatively Random Musings #7
Anything can happen to anyone at any time. What a horrible idea. Who can feel relaxed under those circumstances? Where is my protective bubble? Maybe it’s in the fantasy store I made up in my mind, where you can also purchase a unicorn sandwich. Life will always unfold as it’s meant to. It was my understanding of life that needed overhauling. As long as I insisted on a fairytale existence every tragic event would be perceived as a gypsy curse or a cosmic error. My pain is alw

Relatively Random Musings #7
Anything can happen to anyone at any time. What a horrible idea. Who can feel relaxed under those circumstances? Where is my protective bubble? Maybe it’s in the fantasy store I made up in my mind, where you can also purchase a unicorn sandwich. Life will always unfold as it’s meant to. It was my understanding of life that needed overhauling. As long as I insisted on a fairytale existence every tragic event would be perceived as a gypsy curse or a cosmic error. My pain is alw

Relatively Random Musings #6
I was ready for something new to happen. I sent this request to the celestial mini-mart but got no response. It occurred to me that even though I was saying I wanted something to happen, my behavior was telling a different story. How can I say I want something new when I was still eating the same exact food for lunch every day? If you want something new to happen then do something new. More than words, the universe appreciates action. So, I’ve started to change my routine. Th

Relatively Random Musings #6
I was ready for something new to happen. I sent this request to the celestial mini-mart but got no response. It occurred to me that even though I was saying I wanted something to happen, my behavior was telling a different story. How can I say I want something new when I was still eating the same exact food for lunch every day? If you want something new to happen then do something new. More than words, the universe appreciates action. So, I’ve started to change my routine. Th

Relatively Random Musings #5
You’re not who I thought you’d be because I made you up. Why did I do that? Like Doctor Frankenstein, I stole bits of other people and stitched them together. I reanimated my past and brought it to life again through you. The thrilling “It’s Alive!”, followed rapidly by the monster I created who wants to destroy me. This need to relive the same unpleasant experience over and over again is pretty crazy. If it’s horrible the first time, why do it again? The myth that it will be

Relatively Random Musings #5
You’re not who I thought you’d be because I made you up. Why did I do that? Like Doctor Frankenstein, I stole bits of other people and stitched them together. I reanimated my past and brought it to life again through you. The thrilling “It’s Alive!”, followed rapidly by the monster I created who wants to destroy me. This need to relive the same unpleasant experience over and over again is pretty crazy. If it’s horrible the first time, why do it again? The myth that it will be